rollercoaster ride...

it seems so often that just when i'm really in a very good space with God, it is so quickly for me to experience the opposite. it's not that i think i get into spiritual "pride"... it just seems that my foot sometimes is just not as secure as i would like it to be.

maybe it's got something to do with my emotions, that rides high and low so quickly... and maybe it's because of the war raging for my soul... and that's when i need to remind myself... Love is not a feeling, it's an act of your will.

God's love doesn't change. His intimacy with me doesn't change, unless i let it. His intentions for me doesn't change. And often it's just an attack on my heart from the evil one or one of his evil mates. the heart is the source of all things and it belongs to God.

important to know that God renewed it, it's new... not sinful and awful, but new... yet, sometimes, satan still tries to plant a thought in there, that's not from God. and that is where we need to take those thoughts captive in the Name of Jesus. and remember that every day, every step of the way, we are on a battle ground. sometimes we get a bit of a reprieve, but still the battle rages on through the ages. so stand up and FIGHT!

and when those thoughts come and you feel a bit like a wave in the sea, stand upon the Rock... ask for His protection and closeness. plead the blood of Jesus. read His word, do not forget any of His promises, or any of the things He's already done for you. And know that He is intently interested in every detail of your life. That's what a true relationship means.

and HANG ON to His glorious Name... and praise Him. nothing that gets us on the winning side like Praising His Holy Name!!

meeting place

so in the early morning hours

when i wait for You to meet me

i smile at the thought of You

Loving Father, Saviour too

yes as i wait for You to meet me

entering in this special place

my heart is filled with anticipation

my spirit filled with Your great love

You always make time

to walk beside me

always come, i just need to ask

i thank You Lord that You really SEE me

and that You really are my God

The year of the Lord's favour!

There is nothing more amazing, than when God reveals Himself to His people. And this is what we are currently experiencing... in more than one church, people have experienced God saying: "This is the year!" "This is the year that I will reveal my glory to my people".

And I am excited. I believe there has been a time where we havent really thought that much about God's glory. That we sort of got used to not seeing miracles, that we started believing the great lie that God only did it in the olden days.

But this is the Truth: God says "This is the year of the Lord's favour!". All we need to do is to seek His face. Ask me and I will show you great things, says the Lord. Let's seek Him with all of our hearts! And see His glory!

Mustardseed faith

what is faith? so often we speak about faith as if it is something that is still to happen, and that like Thomas, if we can only see it, we will believe.

In the Amplified Bible Hebrews 11:1 says "NOW FAITH is the assurance (the confirmation, [a]the title deed) of the things [we] hope for, being the proof of things [we] do not see and the conviction of their reality [faith perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses]."

This means that even though we can not perceive it in the physical world, God says through faith we have the titledeed of that which we can not see.

Faith is not based on anything we are, but totally on who God is. It is not about our strength of believe, it is about God's allmighty power. It's not about my ability to "think" things into being, it's about God's sovereign might to bring things into being.

So as we walk with God and get to know His faithful nature more and more, and His loving Father heart towards us, we can look more at Him, and the promises He has made than at the so called "facts" which we can perceive in this world.

And with the power of faith, the size of a mustardseed, God can move mountains. Let's ask God to grow our faith, so that the world can see He is alive!

emotions, emotions, emotions

in those moments where i am totally at peace, but yet also just so human and feel the strong pangs of missing the one i love and can not be with right now, i know that God sees me and reaches out.

and this is where i think we often make the mistake. God took great care in giving us a range of emotions and when the Bible speaks about finding your joy in the Lord, it doesn't mean that we should always walk around with a "haha" happy happy attitude. too often Christians do not get real about how we're really feeling in the hope that others will think that we find our joy and peace in Him, and it becomes a bit of an achievement culture. the happier, the closer we must be to God?

serving Jesus does not mean that i will only have the so-called positive emotions. too often sadness or feeling tired or down is seen as "negative emotions". it is only when satan uses these to keep us in bondage that it becomes a problem.

but the Bible shows us that Jesus felt anxiety and anger and sadness. when he heard that Lazarus had died, he cried. i think he mostly cried for Lazarus' friends and his family, but also for him. i think he also cried, because it made the gap that had come between God and man because of sin, so tangible for Him to see. when He saw what the sellers had done to God's beloved temple, He got angry and chased them out. when He saw how the leaders of Israel were misleading His people, He called them for what they were. when He realised that His time to be separated from His Father and the time to carry the sins of the world was upon Him, He took it to His Father in anxiety, and was sweating blood. He asked God if it could not be different.

And maybe that is what we need to learn - in all our emotions, albeit feeling good or feeling like death, we need to take it to our heavenly Father. He longs to help us carry where we are too tired to go on, He longs to share the moments where life just seems incredibly good, He longs to hold us when it just hurts too much. He longs to walk with us, speak to us, commune with us.

He longs to be there every step of the way, whether we're crying or celebrating. He is our God.

Closer to God

When bad things happen to good people, there is often one of two responses. Either God doesn't care or God is not in control. So quick are people to then say that free choice is not that important and that God could have stopped whatever happened from happening.

God sometimes allows bad things to happen to His children. Not because He wants to punish them. Not because He doesn't love them. Just because He is a fair God and He it would not be fair that all the bad stuff only happened to people not believing in Him. But so often, if we ask Him He does protect us, or something happens that seems really terrible but in hindsight was a warning for something worse.

And when bad things happen which we dont understand, we do have the amazing promises of His word. He says in Romans 8:28 " And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." In Romans 8:37 - 39 the Word says "No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

And in this lies the secret, when bad things happen to you, God wants us to move closer to Him, not further away. He wants to lift you up in His arm, surround you with His goodness, calm you with His peace. He wants to reassure you of His love, carry you were it gets too hard to go any further. He wants to be your rearguard and your Salvation. So move closer to Him! Under the shadow of His wing, He can dry your tears and let all things work for the good of those who love Him. By looking to Him in faith, we allow Him to take even the bad and turn it into good. He can do that because He is God - and He loves us.