it's been a while since i've blogged... it's been a hard journey to be on... somehow sometimes it seems that being a Christian makes life harder... but i also know that without God in my life, I wouldn't know how to live.
Right now, God is teaching me about resting in Him. now if you're even a little bit like me, patience is definitely not your strong point. patience has NEVER been my strong point. sorting things out, making sure everything and everyone's ok, now you've got me there... but this waiting... upon His Will, His decisions, His guidance... although i know very well that if i do not wait, i will muck it up... i'm just not that good with.
so there are times that i sit at God's feet and literally say, "Lord, i'm hopeless at this, i've tried and failed over and over again, teach me... teach me how to wait upon you." and then some days i see a glimpse of that... sometimes i can even almost get through a whole few hours, before my head starts to do me in again. sometimes... i see a glimpse of what God has in store for me, if i can just wait.
and other times, i just do not seem to be able to do what i want. how i relate to paul saying the good that he wants to do, he can't and the bad that he doesn't want to do, he does... maybe that's why it is in the Bible, because even Paul, who wrote so much of the Bible, battled with doing what he wanted to to please God.
so for now, i'll go forward in my journey.... Abraham was very old before God called him.... so maybe there is still some hope for you and me... now if only i could know where to... see there i go again... Lord teach me to wait PATIENTLY at Your feet, because i know that your timing is perfect.
