I am thankful...

as I look back at what could arguably be the hardest year I've ever had and times where I felt totally alone, I am thankful.


I am thankful for opportunities to do something that has never been done before even though  it nearly killed me.  I am thankful for miracles big and small that I've witnessed and experienced.  I am thankful that God decided when I was done.


I am thankful for times when I had no where to turn but God.  I am thankful for times that even when it didn't feel that God was present in my life, yet He still was there.


I am thankful to have learnt in a year that I could surrender to "whatever Lord".  That "whatever" is a place of true surrender and true freedom. That I had learnt about moments where I am thankful that even though it seemed as if God was not providing what I needed, He did.  That even in those times when there was not food for petrol, or debit orders bounced for the first time in 15 years, God knew what I needed - and that the world would not come to an end and that humbling myself in explaining my circumstances to someone would not kill me.


I am grateful for friends and family that held up my hands, kept me in their prayers, comforted my tears, walked beside me when words failed and shared in my moments of joy and elation.


I am thankful for 2010 - the good and the bad, the easy and the tough, the moments of elation and moments of devastation.  I am thankful for that which is past, and thankful that the future is also in His hands.


I want to live a life of gratitude, because I have so much not having deserved any of it.  I want to thank the God of enough.  It has been a good good year.

there is more!

so i've found there is more than this, more than just what the eye sees.  


to you with the big car, the massive house, the designer family, there is so much more.  to you the power hungry, that destroys everything that was before, just because it wasn't your idea.... there is more.


to you who manipulate those human beings that you're suppose to nurture and twist the truth, and maneuver everything to suit your goals, your wants, your needs... i'm telling you there is more.


to you whose heart has been broken, who's living in pain and daily agony, who's feeling isolated and can not think about the next 24 hours... there is more.


to you who is worried about the next bit of money, to pay the rent, pay with your soul, have something new that will bring you joy... there is more.


to the lost, the lonely, those who pretend they're ok, but they're not. it is ok, there is more.


there is a God who wants to bestow on you - love, joy, peace, hope, faith... in case you say "i'm too weary", "love is not enough", "no-one really cares", "my money will buy me happiness", "i'm too intelligent to believe", trust me and let me tell you there is more.


there is a life that is free, filled with love and unspeakable peace, that goes beyond understanding.  there is fullness beyond what you have ever experienced in your life.  there is abundance of relevation, excitement, contentment and those things that you have searched your whole life for.  trust me, i've been there.  all you have to do is ask.


and He WILL answer.